"Staci one of the kindest, most supportive women I have ever worked with. She related with my life quickly and easily giving me advice I was able to put into action in my personal and professional life! Her easy going attitude, loving spirit and conversational coaching style make her a joy to work with. Her southern accent is easy on the ears too!"
- Melissa Kaye, Whole Life Success Coach
I'm Staci Gustiuc, life coach + change agent to women who are ready to go from worn out and stuck to relaxed and started with their goals and therefore their life. All while becoming free from doubt- doubt caused by rejection, domestic abuse, regret, mistakes, mindset blocks, or a combination of these. Freeing women from their doubt allows them to step into their truth and work towards their God-give purpose. I'm here to empower you until you know this truth, YOU were created on purpose for a purpose.
Helping women break through old patterns of negative thoughts, belittling self-talk, and the belief that their past has rendered them unworthy, undeserving, and beyond repair is what light's me up inside. Being able to witness when a woman realizes how amazing, valuable, worthy, and totally capable she is leaves me speechless (in a fabulous way)!
By helping you change your thought patterns into positive and empowering messages you are then able to step into your truth and begin living a life of freedom. I help you learn to tell fear to grab a seat in the back and enjoy the ride as you fulfill your God-given purpose.
Helping you take your BIG dreams and break them down into doable bite size daily goals/action steps truly lights me up. It's then that you begin to see just how much is possible and that you can start without overwhelm instead of being sent into a panic that would cause you to give up. Taking those BIG dreams in your head and putting them into focus so they become your reality is what I live to create with my clients!
I help you do all of these things because I once struggled with them as well. I allowed my life to pass me by due to a number of these things. I don't want you to do the same. I'm here to empower you to step into your truth and live out your God-given purpose. I allowed all those negative thoughts, belittling self-talk, doubts and fears to hold me captive for far too long. I will help you become the woman of God you were created to be.
SUCH A GREAT QUESTION! SO GLAD YOU ASKED, I LIKE YOU ALREADY!
I mentioned above that I struggled with self-doubt, negative thoughts, belittling myself, mindset blocks, and the belief that my past had rendered me unworthy, undeserving, and beyond repair just to name a few things. All of these things deeply effected the decisions I made and the course that my life took. There were many years where I was lost, unsure of myself and my abilities (actually I didn't think I had any), settled in my relationships, and allowed others to run all over me. This was all because I was too fearful to step into my truth.
For as long as I can remember I've been the shy girl who hid behind her mother afraid to speak up. I was considered shy, easy-going, quite, loyal, fearful, and naive. I never wanted to speak up about anything out of the fear of being rejected, embarrassed, looking/sounding stupid, or being the odd one out. This meant I kept most of my true thoughts to myself or wouldn't bother to check-in with my feelings. I didn't create boundaries with people in my life. I didn't speak up for what I believed in. Worst of all I didn't value myself or my thoughts. This caused many trials in my life.
I constantly found myself in relationships that were unhealthy, unfulfilling, degrading, and left me feeling worse about myself after each one ended. I settled time and time again feeling like I didn't deserve more due to decisions I had made in my past. I was running from God trying to live by my own rules.
I'll share a personal experience with the intention to inspire you and to show you that it doesn't matter what your past is you can create the future you desire.
At the age of 19 I entered into what would be my first serious long-term relationship. Prior to this I had just left an unhealthy living arrangement with "friends" and moved to another town. While hanging out with a girlfriend I had recently met at work I was introduced to several of her friends that we ran into one night. That night is definitely a blur to say the least, but I do know I gave him my phone number because he called me later the next day. I had NO IDEA who he was (scary)! I remember asking him to repeat his name like three or four times before I could recall him. After that he recapped how we met the night before which jogged my memory a bit. That was the beginning to a very rocky and long five years of my life!
Like any good mom my mother could clearly see red flags flying up all over the place and that was without me giving her much information about him. Naturally, I did the exact opposite of what she wanted me to do and ran straight towards him! (Side note, she will be pretty excited to see me admitting that she was right.) Since I was living with her at the time and it was her house and her rules I decided I had to get the h-e-double hockey sticks outta there and into my own place. My choice of words has greatly improved since then and I'm happy to admit that!
So there I was living in my very first apartment alone. But not really truly alone in the physical sense. By now my new boyfriend was staying basically every single night with me. At the time I was completely happy about this you know the whole my house my rules kinda thing! The problem was I wasn't taking notes from my mom about what type of rules I should have for my house. Again, I lacked boundaries in every sense of the word!
i had blinders on, ear plugs in, and was completely naive!
I can recall him picking me up from work one night and us driving to my apartment. On the way there I heard voices yelling his name and as I turned and looked out the window I saw a car driving beside us with a few females inside. I don't remember him saying much or anything about it and I honestly thought they were some friends being silly. We make it to my apartment, got inside and got situated. I remember he was giving me a back massage when we heard something break outside. Someone had thrown a beer bottle at his car as they drove by. Not long after that there was an anxious and loud pounding on my front door. He reassured me he would get the door and handle the situation. Once he came back inside he told me it was nothing just some crazy ex-girlfriend who wasn't over him yet making a scene. I totally believed him. That was the first of many scenarios that played out while we were together. The only thing that really changed throughout the years was me not believing his stories as much.
yet i wanted to believe him, I wanted it to work, so i stayed!
As time went on I became more aware of his non-committal behavior, his constant lies, his angry temper and outburst, and his lack of respect towards me. You know if I was reading this and someone else was the author I'd be screaming on the inside LEAVE! LEAVE and never look back, he's no good for you, girl you deserve so much better, just leave. I'd also be wondering why in the world does she stay? Is she stupid, blind, desperate to be in a relationship? It just wouldn't make sense to me. But since I was knee deep in it I couldn't really see things like that. There were many occasions when we broke-up due to me catching him in a lie or finding something inappropriate on his phone, MySpace Page, or in his email. Yes, I had turned into that crazy girlfriend who searched through his things because he had given me plenty of reasons not to trust him. I had become a detective as he liked to refer to me.
Other times I was receiving phone calls from girls telling me about their encounters, letters in our mailbox, or my car was being vandalized. Despite all of that we would quickly reconcile and I'd still have hope that this time would be different. I hoped things would be different because we had so much history together. You know the story we had been through the good and the bad together. Not to mention we had invested so much of our time and effort into the relationship and if I quit then it would have been all for nothing. I just wasn't ready to let that happen, so I held on and I held on...
live in a constant state of stress!
Seriously stress became a normal feeling for me over the course of many years. Our relationship had exploded into more of a mess and turned dangerously toxic. It had become abusive both mentally, physically, and emotionally! I remember the very first time our argument turned physical. I don't remember what the topic of the argument was but I remember him pacing around the apartment in anger. We were yelling at each other going from the living room to the bedroom. At some point he took my cell phone and threw it and there it was sticking out of my bedroom wall. I was shocked and pissed off all at the same time. Then he pushed me down and I fell onto the bed. The look on my face gave it all away. He knew immediately I couldn't believe what just happened, I was so shocked he put his hands on me! I don't recall how he left but I remember going to lock the door and him coming back very quickly wanting back in. I remember him sitting outside the door begging for me to let him in, he was crying, and apologizing.
I was shocked, scared, pissed off, sad, and confused all at the same time. This was my first experience with a man putting his hands on me. I couldn't believe I had allowed this to happen to me. How did I put myself in such a position? I had always said no man would ever put his hands on me. Yet there I was. It was over I thought, I'm done! What's sad is that was the least aggressive physical altercation we ever had and that's because our relationship wasn't over. We quickly made up and went on our way. Did he promise that he would never do it again? YES, he sure did. Did he tell me numerous times he was sorry? YES, he sure did. Did I believe him? Absolutely!
I feel like I should add this little side note in. I realize that some people might think I'm making a big deal out of a very small situation. I use to be one of those people who thought that way. But that's because I had been surrounding myself with people who experienced these types of situations (or worse) or were the people causing them so they were normal occurrences in their eyes. It wasn't until many years later I truly learned that this type of behavior is wrong, totally unacceptable, totally inappropriate, and completely out of line. I urge you to research the effects of domestic violence especially the generational ones. If you find yourself in an abusive relationship seek out help now.
There are many parts to this story but I'm sure you get the idea by now. I was in this toxic and at times abusive relationship for about five years and it wasn't pretty. It was stressful, demoralizing, confusing, heartbreaking, and painful. However I dug deep within myself and left for good. I had to move about eight hours away to give myself plenty of distance while I separated my head from my heart and got back on my feet.
I found confidence in myself and my decision. I made fear take the back seat as I changed the course of my life (doing this was terrifying). I created boundaries. I became courageous! Most importantly I stepped into my truth!
Once I did that so many things in my life began to change for the better. This wasn't an overnight change though as I still had many things to work through. I can tell you this I was able to enroll in college full-time, made amazing new goal driven friends, met and married an amazingly supportive and loyal man, graduated with my bachelors of science with honors, and started my own business that truly makes a difference in the world. My biggest accomplishment to date is being a mama to the most amazing daughter I could have ever asked for. She was with me every step of my journey, she is my WHY, she is my reason for dreaming big, she is my motivation and inspiration. She is the one who opened up my eyes while she could barely open her own! Had I not had her I might still be in that relationship. God knew what I needed to wake up and get my life in order!